Wedding Wednesday: "Every Girl Crazy 'bout a Sharp Dressed Man"

ZZ Top was right, “Every girl crazy ‘bout a sharp dressed man”.  

You want your groom and groomsmen to look like sharp dudes!

A few weeks ago, I wrote about finding your wedding dress, but we don’t want to leave the fellas out!  What they wear on your wedding day is a big decision as well!  Since I knew NOTHING about men’s formal wear, I figured there are probably other readers just as lost as I was.

To start, figure out the formality of your wedding.  Is it a casual, laid back vibe on a beach, a black-tie affair, or somewhere in between?

Things to note when determining formality:

1.       You will want to make the formality match the location of your wedding.  If you are getting married in the sand on the beach, you probably don’t want to have your groom and groomsmen in a top hat and tails

2.       If you decide to go toward black-tie or white-tie, please note that there are a few things etiquette-wise that you must adhere to in order for it to be classified as black-tie.

a.       It must be an evening affair

b.      Open bar with top shelf liquor, a band, and plated meal with passed hors d’ouevres are desired.

Essentially, it should be a top-of-of-the-line event if you are going to make your guests rent tuxedos and wear formal gowns.

3.       The largest number of weddings I have been to have been semi-formal or cocktail attire, but the invitation style should indicate the formality here.

a.       This usually means nice suits or tuxedos for the men, cocktail dresses and/or longer for the bridesmaids.  Most guests typically wear a nice suit and/or cocktail dress

We’re about to pick out the groom’s attire.  What are all these styles?

Jackets

You will make the largest decisions surrounding the jacket (and in turn the matching pants) for your groom’s attire.  Here is a list of the types of jackets, descriptions, and suggestions as to when to wear each.

Suit

For casual elegance, the suit is your best bet.  These are often used to make the event semi-formal.  These are also great for the summer and/or during the day when a tuxedo likely wouldn’t fit the style of the wedding.

You will need to have the men buy the suit, or find a tuxedo rental location that ALSO rents suits if you are looking to go this route.  (See Tuxedo for lapels and breast)

Tuxedo
This jacket is very common among weddings and can go from semi-formal to formal.  You will have to make a number of choices once you have settled on the Tuxedo (See Lapels).  Tuxedos, like most suits have various options when it comes to how it is “breasted” (aka how many and the configuration of buttons on the jacket. 

Options include: Single-breasted (with a one- to four-button front)

Double-breasted (with a two- to six-button front).

You will also likely need to determine the venting on the jacket.  The vents are the slits in the back of the jacket that allow for additional air flow under the hot wool.  Vents usually come in the following configurations: no vents, single vent, double vent.  Ask to see all types at the shop.  You will likely want to see all types on your groom as the vents do impact how the jacket fits

Tuxedos are good for evening weddings.  Technically you are supposed to wear a morning coat if you are doing a more formal daytime wedding, however, many modern weddings also have tuxedos at semi-formal-formal daytime weddings too.

Tailcoat
Think “penguin”.  The tailcoat is cropped in front, with two tails in the back and a two- to six-button front. These are generally worn at VERY formal evening weddings.

Mandarin, a.k.a. Nehru jacket, Mao jacket
This jacket features a vertical collar with no lapel (Think The Beatles in Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band)  The collared shirt that is worn with this jacket often comes to a closure with a button.

Again, this can be worn in place of a suit or tuxedo, I have never actually seen this worn at a wedding.

Morning coat
For formal daytime weddings, the groom wears the cutaway coat -- short in the front, long in the back, and tapering from the front waist button to a wide back tail. Cutaway jackets are either black or gray and are worn with matching striped trousers.

(Think formal English day wedding)

Lapels

Notched lapel
Notched lapels have a triangular indention where the lapel joins the collar. This is considered the least formal lapel style.

Shawl collar
A shawl collar provides a smooth lapel, without notches.  (See Hugh Hefner’s smoking jacket).  These can often be in a different fabric than the jacket (i.e. satin).  This can be formal, but is less popular.

Peaked lapel
Peaked lapels are named such for the V-shape the lapel makes as it points up and out below the collar line.  This is very common for tuxedos, tailcoats and morning coats. This broad, V-shaped lapel points up and out just below the collar line.

Shirt Collars

Wing collar
Wing collar shirts are very formal.  They are mostly reserved for those opting for bow ties and have a collar that stands vertical except at the points.  The collar points are folded slightly downward.  Standard ties don’t look great with this type of collar because the collar does not fold down around the rest of the tie.

Mandarin collar, a.k.a. band collar
This collar stands vertical around the neck and is frequently worn with a Mandarin Jacket.  It is the most contemporary-style shirt..

Spread collar
Spread collars are very common.  This type of shirt resembles a standard button-front shirt but features a wide division between points in front. The wider collar looks great with a Euro tie or a standard necktie tied in a Windsor knot.

Neckwear

There are many types of neckwear, but I’m only going to cover the two main ties.

Bow tie
Bow ties scream “Classic Tuxedo”.  You can get bow ties in many colors besides basic black, however white is only reserved for super-formal events.  Colored bow ties can be worn at any occasion

Necktie
For  a more casual, but still elegant, look at a standard necktie. I’ve seen these at many weddings.

Mr. Bear, groomsmen and the fathers wore these at our wedding.  Mr. Bear had ivory tie, the groomsmen had plum and the fathers had black.  It was a nice way to provide distinction between each, while still creating a cohesive look.

    (notched tuxedo with vest and necktie)

Accessories

Vests, a.k.a. waistcoats

Vests can go from ultra-formal to semi-formal.  Pair it with a Tailcoat for a very formal look.  You can also pair with a standard tuxedo in various colors to match the tie.  This is a very common look.

We went with the necktie and vest for our wedding.

Cummerbunds
Cummerbunds are worn around the  waist in lieu of a vest. They are usually basic black and paired with a bow tie, however,  you can choose a colored cummerbund to match the bridesmaid dresses or the wedding colors.  These were very popular in the 80’s and 90’s.  I haven’t really seen them lately

Whew!  And you thought wedding dresses had a lot of options!  Above all, make sure your groom wears what he is comfortable wearing.  He should have a large amount of input since it is what he will be wearing for the day of your wedding.  We decided that Mr. Bear would select the actual tuxedo style for the wedding and I would help with colors for the vests/neckties.  It worked out well.  He got to try on a lot of different styles before making a decision, determining which style fit his body-type.

-Danielle